Week 9

Gottman references that 69% of arguments are perpetual. I think this is pretty accurate. I know in my own life, I can think of a handful of topics that my wife and I argue about. Arguing about money and workload are two of the main things we get frustrated with. I don’t think I am alone in those two topics either. For the 7 years we have been together, there has always been arguments about finances and how we can improve on it. While things have improved, I can say that we still argue about this topic. When I bring up workload I mean the things that need to be done but both of us would like to avoid, like work, cleaning the house, or changing diapers we will often argue about one particular week I am pulling the weight and then next week my wife is pulling the weight and sometimes we can just get fed up with things. These two topics are something that I can say, actually have gotten better but neither of us are perfect and we will most likely argue about these things. I love the talk by Elder Faust “The Healing Power of Forgiveness”, he states “If we can find forgiveness in our hearts for those who have caused us hurt and injury, we will rise to a higher level of self-esteem and well-being. Some recent studies show that people who are taught to forgive become “less angry, more hopeful, less depressed, less anxious and less stressed,” which leads to greater physical well-being. Another of these studies concludes “that forgiveness … is a liberating gift [that] people can give to themselves.”.” Its easier to find fault in someone and not see past their weaknesses, but its a far more worthy cause to look past those weaknesses and love someone for what God see’s them as. I know as I have looked past my wife’s weaknesses, she has done the same and looked past my weakness’s. We try and see each other as the lord see’s us. Even though we often argue about money or how much work we do around the house, we really just want to be heard and appreciated for the work that we do.